Full disclosure, I’ve racked my brain trying hard to imagine what my son Dominic would say to me in reply to my letter to him. I simply only know him as an innocent, helpless newborn. The only communication I ever had with him was nothing more than barely voluntary chemical reactions, some based on emotion, such as coos, cries and smiles. I have no clue what my son would be or look like. I could never justify knowing or imagining what he would be like as it simply wouldn’t be my son and only my imagination.
Dominic did leave one, infallible gift behind for me, a definition of love the likes of which I’ve never known. Dominic and my sister both were beacons to me and so, I whole-heartedly hope that a letter typed by my late sister, Pearlz, with Dominic right by her side, from both of them will suffice as I believe they both would share a kindredly similar message.
Dear Dad / Hey Bro,
One day at a time please. As you know, this is not the end. The fact of our existence doesn’t change because of our passing. Please take the time to nurture what we left in your heart. Nurture love and let it be your guide, your compass in finding your way through the crushing waves of grief. Wouldn’t life be so much sweeter with an escape from the pain? What in your lifetime, dad/brother, has ever tasted finer than such love for another? We know how deep and dark the oceans of grief are. However, you dad, can overcome any crushing blows and obstacles trying to stop you from something you truly want, from what you know you need. Spirituality aside, you know the indigenous interpretation of the two wolves inside you. You know which are the two wolves in you and now, which one to feed.
Dad, I know there are a million unanswered questions and as many unfair times in our lives. Even as a newborn! Trust me, coming into this world in itself, is quite the rough ride.
Life is… no, life is not always what you make of it, but it cannot have good times without hard ones. Make the good moments what matter most. Make those you love, matter most. Make what makes you and your loved ones happiest matter most. What else is life, if we don’t cherish what we can from it? What is your life, without love? Focus on the love inspired from us, your loved ones, and enjoy that most blissful high you get from equally sharing that love with another while you yet live.
Love you always, no matter what.
Dominic and Pearlz.
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